Wow, and what a few days they were. The last few days of the chemo kicked my a**! I had all kinds of good ideas for writing and some decent stories, but now I have bubkus! I think days 5-7 and the ensuing 1st day of recovery wiped my brain blank. So instead of trying to humor myself (and you) tonight, I'll just give an update on those last few days.
At least all the fantasy football drafts are complete now and I don't have to worry about ER, chemo and me falling asleep getting in the way of football.
I'm not sure how I would describe the chemo process, things just kind of creep up on you while going through the process. Some people get some of the side effects, and some people get others. It feels like I've had a fever issue pre chemo, during chemo, and a little bit post chemo. They have had to treat some of the fever with antibiotics as well as with just Tylenol. As I mentioned in earlier posts, you try to get rest, but it just doesn't add up really well. I think the most I've slept in one continuous sleep is probably 4 hours. Most of the sleep you get is because you can't do anything else and your worn out from medication or breaking a fever.
My body showed a reaction to one of the medication (not the chemo) and I've developed a rash all over. The good news is that it doesn't itch very much. Trying to nail down the cause has involved the infectious disease team as well as the dermatologist. The problem is that they can't just stop some of the antibiotics cold because of other repercussions. Over the past few days, it doesn't appear to be getting worse... so that's nice.
I guess the side effect that I have found the worst is the mouth developing sores (everywhere), and while it makes talking painful, they make eating a task you wouldn't wish on anyone. I haven't been answering the phone because isn't worth it right now, my apologies.
I guess it was milestone to complete the 7+3 induction chemo, but for the last day or so and the first afterward, I had zero energy to answer email or do anything other than break fevers, order a bed change, or take a shower. And I had really gotten used to the daily 1/2 hour break from chemo to take a hot shower. I even developed some naked exercises/stretching to stay in the shower longer.
Of course the mood varies, but I am not discouraged. It's more of a hunker down mode. So Lynn, Mom, JR, and Dad, I'm fighting with you guys while you are here and when you aren't. Same goes to everyone contacting me with well wishes. It's still early and we'll take it day by day.... and today was good.
13 comments:
Steve,
To say your writing brings back bad memories is an understatement. I wish I could give you some grand sage advice that would help you, but you are doing what is necessary and that is the name of the game. I know food is unappealing, but try to find things you can get down. I got obsessively compulsive with food. I either hated it beyond belief or cherished every mouthful of certain types when I had a good day. For instance, I ate beef jerky out the ying yang for awhile and now that thought of the stuff nauseates me. Aside from the jerky, meat just seemed to work for me. If there is ever a time to shed that chicken diet, this would be it. I assume you have restrictions given your white counts, but do your best. Try Vitamin Water. This was my go to drink and is about the only thing I was consuming that doesn't make me ill today. Man, you are so right about the hospital. It is kind of a screwed up place and in some ways is counter to logic. However, the hospital is filled with good people that genuinely care about you. I know you are not, but don't ever be bashful about asking for anything. Take whatever they offer to help get you through. Keep up the fight. Take your next breath. Break that next fever. Make it through the next night. For some inexplicable reason this has been thrust upon you. However, you are a Superman amongst mere mortals. You will get through it and you will be a better and stronger man because of it. Jen and I will be thinking of you. Anything you need, just ask. Your family, friends, and those that don't even know you are with you. Take care!
Jason Weiner
Steve.......you and Jason are tough guys! God bless you both!..Dad
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Good to hear you had a good day or two. I know it's been torture. Hang in there. One day at a time. (I think you used to like that show, or was it just Valerie Bertonelli pre Van Halen?) Speaking of which, you may be the only person who liked Van Halen better after David Lee Roth left. I think you were a huge Sammy Hagar fan (who now is known better for his tequilla than his music).
Anyway, I hope you didn;t have to suffer through the Bengals today. Luckily we didn't get the game here. We were planning to go to the sports bar for the 2nd half if it was close. So I saved the $40 and went to the pool instead.
Caught a camellion in our bedroom today. Rhea would have freaked had she seen it in the middle of the night. Swear she would claim it to have been a huge snake.
A belated thanks for talking Rhea into getting me the laptop for my bday. These things are dangerous. Combine it with fantasy football and baseball in the Fall and it could be trouble. I haven't even tried the live streams of DMB yet on Sat night. That could be trouble.
Have a good night and good day tomorrow. We're always thinking and praying for you you.
Much love.
John and I are sending you all our love and hugs. Get your ass strong so you can finish out this bowling season even if you can't start it. I have a couple dates I'm gonna miss. Surprise. Surprise. This totally sucks but if there is anyone that can beat it, we know it's you. Keep praying, sleeping, pissing people off and eat when you can. luv ya
Steve---
I personally am fortified by your objectivity and practicality. If only I could give you some of my appetite. You and your friend Jason, have caught the essence of hospitals, the uselessness of sage advice from professionals and nonprofessionals alike and the impossibilities of rest. If only someone would invent a HoliDeck for hospitals.
Hope today is another good one.
Blackie
Shoop -
Just wanted to let you know that the updates provided by your posts are very much appreciated by those of us thinking and praying for you. Glad to hear that yesterday was a "good" one.
Naked exercises and stretching in the shower, eh? Well ... okay then. That's a visual that I wasn't really planning on having, but I guess what they say is true, great writing really is in the details. ;-)
Win each day.
DB
Steve - well, we're thinking about you and praying for you constantly down South. Keep the blogs up when you feel like it, we check them every day.
Now, about our previous description of the Buckeyes.....well, let's just say we've reconsidered our position following the trouncing of the Hurricanes. It was an impressive showing. Made us think it'll be the Bucks and the Tide playing for the BCS in January.
The Bullpuppies.......well, we think the 2011 season could be ours for the taking.
Hang in there, we're all with you.
steve,
glad to get a blog update from you and to hear how things are going. stay after the bad guys! i am wishing them away.
hope you were able to enjoy some football this weekend-me, not so much even though the jags won yesterday. i was talking to beth on saturday and your love of sport is having an effect on her. she said she was actually checking sports scores - to check on your teams, i think :).
look forward to your next update!
jo
Thanks for the updates, bro. Means a lot for us to be included. We're all here for you.
E.D.
Steve,
From one Oakvistan to another, you are in my thoughts and prayers constantly. (And yes, I am blowing off work right now to leave this post because, well, family is more important).
Heck of a win for Tressel & Co this weekend, I'm sure you enjoyed watching them take care of business against The U as much as I did.
Certainly an exciting time for our Redlegs; I was at Great American last night for the clinching of the first winning season since 2000. As I am sure you watched & heard, Bruce had one hell of a welcome back party, and as soon as I sat down and said to my buddy, "Stubbs is gonna poke one out too," fireworks were being shot in right field for back to back taters. As they said on WLW on the way down to the game, "15 is the magic number, like George Foster," they followed up with "with a Cardinals loss tonight, 13, like Davey Concepción, will the new magic number," on the way home.
I did secure NLDS tickets, and if Aunt Judy will let me, I'm going to commandeer our light-up Christmas Eve Pigs & drape myself in them. Quite frankly, it doesn't matter if the Reds have the potential 4 PM start, I have 4 weeks of vacation accrued/stockpiled and can think of fewer situations where it will be more appropriate to use that time, if needed. I'll be there, loud, proud and with plenty of Miller Lite in my bloodstream, heckling the divisional foe with you and our years of Christmas Eve lineups in mind. The next time I see you, I'll tell you about shots of chilled Jameson with Chris Dickerson in Moe's Cantina in Wrigleyville after the Fourth of July weekend Reds smackdown on the Cubs.
Here's to the Reds taking care of business on the field this year and your treatments doing the same for you.
As one of my favorite people always says, "Go Reds, Bucks & Bengals...Eat Pork!"
Cheers,
Paulie
Thanks for all the comments, some great stuff out there, least of which is the comeback of the bumper sticker "Go Reds, Bengals, Bucks, Eat Pork" AC should get more of those printed.
Jason, thanks a ton for the support, I look forward to meeting you one day soon to compare notes.
I'm with D Best. The visual of you doing naked shower exercises is frightening...
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